Dating Status: Happily single and enjoyed the holiday!
This is a great feeling! And as I enjoyed being content and happy, I found myself thinking of dating Christmases past, present and future.
Holidating dating during the holidays, can be fun and exciting. Bright lights are everywhere providing a magical glow that floats through the air and anything and everything seems possible. Meeting that special someone could be just around the corner, while picking up your next cup of Christmas coffee or even the next swipe right on your dating app. However, dating disasters have a way of sneaking in and can leave you feeling like the Grinch stole your Christmas dating spirit.
Dating Christmas Past
Date one and two went well, there were shared interests and laughter. However, I noticed he did sweat some. Okay, a lot. During the first date he explained he was nervous and on the second date he cooked dinner for us, and he stated he was simply hot from the heat of the stove. Fair enough.
I also noticed he wore the same outfit on both dates, although he did lose the college tie for our second time together. I thought, “That’s okay. It could be laundry day”. Hindsight is 20/20.
When he called to confirm plans for our third date, he expressed his excitement to go to the sky tower deck, as he had not been there before. I had a $100 gift card for a nice restaurant and one complimentary admission to the sky tower deck. He offered to pay for the difference of the gift cards that I had offered to use.
He was 30 minutes late picking me up for our Saturday night date and when he arrived, I noted he wasn’t wearing a coat. Since it was the middle of December and we were going to the sky tower deck, which can be windy, I asked if he had a coat in the car. He simply replied, “No, I’m a big guy and I don’t need a coat. We are late, let’s go.” I should also note here, he was NOT sweating.
He walked me to his 1980 something Green Jeep and asked me if I recognized it from the 80’s movies. I did. His obsession with the 80’s was strong, even twenty years later, although he was kid at that time in history. As he opened the passenger door for me, he said, “Please be careful. I was off roading recently and the passenger seat broke. The back of the seat lies flat. You’ll need to hold yourself up.” What?! We had an hour drive ahead of us. I offered to drive, but he insisted on driving. The passenger side did have a seatbelt, but I wondered if it would work since the back of the chair was lying flat. This turned out to be a core workout, holding myself upright for the long drive.
Since he picked me up late, I called and moved our dinner reservation while we were driving into the city. As we pulled up to the restaurant, we saw police activity in the parking lot and he said to me, “Why don’t you hop out and buy our parking permit, while I try to find us a place to park.” Fair enough, I paid $20 for parking.
We walked into the restaurant and he immediately excused himself to the restroom. The hostess sat me and brought him to our table later. We chatted for a bit and the waitress came by for our drink order. He placed his wine order and then left the table to go to restroom again. He was gone for a while.
When he came back to the table, the waitress appeared to take our order. He had not yet looked at the menu, but he opened it up and with his index finger, ran it down the column with the entrée prices, landed on the most expensive item and stated,” I will take it”.
I assumed he was picking up the difference and it was the holiday season after all, so go for it. After placing his order, he excused himself to the bathroom again and this continued every 15 minutes throughout the rest of the night. Looking back, I wonder if he took some type of water pill so he wouldn’t sweat so much, and it sent him to the rest room often.
The conversation over dinner was enjoyable. He talked about his excitement to fly home and visit his family for the holidays. He clearly thought the world of his older brother, who through his eyes, had the best teenage years growing up in the 80’s. Over the next hour he consumed four glasses of expensive wine, ate his $50 entrée and side dishes, and visited the bathroom four more times – seriously every 15 minutes. I had one glass of wine and a chicken entrée and we shared a dessert.
The waitress brought the check in the leather holder and she began to set it down on the table in front of him. In one brilliant, fluid motion, he stood, extended his arm and with the back of his hand, gently pushed the check to me as he excused himself to the restroom.
Left with the check, I place my $100 gift card in the leather holder and noted the check with tip would be approximately $275 and waited patiently for him to come back. While I waited, I looked over and saw clients from work seated nearby and we exchanged hellos. My date finally reappeared and laughing said, “Did you think I left? Did you take care of the check yet?” I politely remind him he was going to pick up the difference and he responded with, “I’ll get it next time. I’ll go get the car now while you pay the bill.” And he walked away. Not wanting to make a scene with clients a work a table away, I paid the $275 bill and left the restaurant to find him in the car waiting.
I hopped in and started to fall backwards. I had forgotten the seat in the Jeep didn’t have a back. I was ready to go home, but he was already talking about the sky tower deck. We previously planned to park at my work where there wasn’t a charge for parking and walk over to the sky tower deck.
As we were walking, I came up with a little preemptive move to assure myself that I would not be buying his ticket to the attraction. I handed him my ticket and said, “Here’s my complimentary ticket. When you buy your ticket, please hand my ticket to the cashier.” He smiled and placed my ticket in his shirt pocket.
Arriving at our destination check in, I noticed with surprise, my neighbor was there taking photos. The next few minutes simply left me dazed. My date handed my ticket to the cashier and said, “Here is my admission. She will pay for hers.” And then walked over to the “x” on the carpet for the souvenir photo and told me to hurry up and join him.
I gave him a look and heard my neighbor ask, “how would you like to pay for that”? There goes another $30.
I walked towards the elevator and heard my neighbor say, “Don’t forget your photo.” My date reached out, put his arm around me and snap! Yes, now we have a commemorative photo together we were to pick up on our way out.
Reaching the top of the sky tower deck, we stepped out onto the deck and within seconds he said, “I am so cold! I need to go inside! I guess, I need a coat after all!” He went inside, and I kept walking. I took my time walking and enjoying the holiday lights and view of the city. I wondered if he would leave me here. I thought to myself, what’s an $80 taxi ride home on top of everything else? After I walked around once, he came outside and walked a quarter of it to see the city. We made our exit and of course, we picked up the souvenir photo on the way out. He looked happy. Me, not so much. I cropped myself out of that photo the same night.
Back in the car once more, I fell into the Jeep because there is no back to the seat.
When he pulled into my driveway, I hopped out before the Jeep had completely stopped. He said, “Wait, I’ll walk you to the door.” I blurted, “Oh, not necessary. Have a nice Christmas with your family. Bye.” He said, “I’ll call you!”
I woke up the next morning sore from my “core workout” and out $355. However, the laughter I shared with my friends is priceless. And… don’t let the Grinch steal your dating spirit! Bustle up, befriend the Grinch, and keep dating! Which brings me to the present…
Dating Christmas Present
2020 was a crazy year and many people can tell you social distancing simply did not blend well with dating. My Nana and Papa met during World War II, he was an American Soldier and Nana was a young lady in England. My Nana and Papa were happily married for 73 years until Papa passed. Surely if they could meet and marry during a war, I should be able to find a nice man during COVID-19. So, while it might not be easy to date during a pandemic, it’s not impossible.
Nana is still with us and I treasure every moment I have with her. She is my cheerleader and even at 95 she thinks of subtle, creative ways for me to meet men, because a lady as she says, should never be bold. Nana surprised me with the following suggestion. She simply said, “You need to start winking at every man you meet. One will stick.” That’s pure genius! What could possibly go wrong? I wink. They wink back, say hi, or move on.
My December winking game was strong. I left the house with my eye make up on point, brows brushed, lashes lush, wore masks in pretty colors to match my outfits and to make my eyes pop. I gave out winks while Christmas shopping, grocery shopping, filling my car’s gas tank, picking up to go orders, walks on the beach, and even while stopped at a stoplight, a gentleman rolled his window down and ask me for my phone number after receiving a wink. And while one has not “stuck” yet, I found it an energizing thing to do during the day. I received winks back, helped one man pick out bed sheets for his son and engaged in a few fun small conversations.
While most experiences were rewarding, things can still go a little awry with a wink and a smize – smiling with your eyes.
It’s not an easy task performing a wedding ring check with six feet of social distancing guidelines or if they are wearing a winter glove. While shopping in the meat department at my local grocer, I winked at a man over breakfast sausages. He said “hello” and a woman came up behind him, placed an arm on him and the other on their shopping cart and said, “He is with me.” He gave a laugh and I followed up with a quick “Merry Christmas” and moved on to the produce department.
As I was selecting a bunch of bananas, a man strolled by on the other side of the banana aisle. As I winked at him, my contact popped out of my eye and landed on my mask. I reached for it and it fell into the bananas. I looked back at him and he was laughing, so I laughed. He wished me good luck and kept strolling. So much for chivalry.
Decision time. Do I try to find my contact lens in the pile of bananas and if I do happen to find it, do I put it back in my eye? Can I successfully drive home wearing one contact? I decided that in the name of love, my contact lens would take one for the team. I walked around the grocery store filling my basket in permanent wink mode so I could see.
I purchased my groceries, made it home safely and learned an important lesson. From now on I will carry a small bottle of contact solution in my purse. The winter weather and winking can really dry out your contacts.
Dating Christmases Future
My winking & smizing adventures will continue, after all as Nana said, one will stick. I am a firm believer in taking responsibility for creating and maintaining my own happiness and while we all have probably wished for a glimpse into our future, our lives are ultimately up to us.
Wishing you all a Happy New Year and if you are lucky, may winks and smizes be in your future!
The Last Date 